Top four myths about mental health
Myth #1 : (Mental) Health is what you are trying to fix
When thinking about mental health, the word “health” can be misleading. Assuming you are not the unfortunate one suffering from some real disorder, being unwell may be an outcome of something else. Hence, it is only fair to contemplate and appreciate what that something else truly is.
Chaos of life is a stream of events that hit us as meteor showers. If you do not have skills to duck and handle those hits, then the outcome is inevitable.
Some people are naturally good at developing
skills of controlling their own space, others could use a coach and a mentor. It is a mistake to hope for a short term treatment that can put you back in a safe zone. At the end of the day, it is the individual who has to develop the necessary skills for handling the chaos.
The conclusion here is to stop overthinking the mental health aspect. Wondering about the unfairness of the world and “what am I doing wrong” are detractions. If mental health were to be thought of in such generic terms, then it is really the whole of humanity that is screwed up, at this point of time. Within that context, you are probably doing very well. We should snap out of aliking and belittling mental health to the common cold. Coming back to the analogy of mental health vs mental hygiene, our current society is a bit of a rubbish disposal site from more than just an ecological perspective. Living in such a place under equipped and breathing in the fumes of mediocrity will certainly damage one’s health. Change can only come if we take more than one step back in conversations across a full spectrum of topics.
The solution may be to search for an emotionally mature person who can be your sounding board - someone in your circle, a good counsellor, and do not discount yourself as an inner coach. The only real source of strength is from within. You simply need a pattern for managing emotions, making choices, and possibly an inner “parole officer” for staying on the right path.
Myth #2 : Self-reflection solves problems
Systemic help is the one that people seek when facing spiralling issues. In this context, introspection and self-reflection are fundamental patterns. They are great at enabling one to see the forest for the trees, and making things less chaotic. This sort of inspection does not, however, always lead to a better state of mind. It is quite easy to do self reflection the wrong way.
A skill to reflect on one's own journey, qualities and experiences is important for establishing a system of coordinates. The idea is to remove coloured lenses that affect the perception of reality. This process is about being brutally honest about who you are and where you are.
The challenge is that self-reflection can turn into self lambasting. If you are already under pressure, do not self-reflect by yourself. Find a good person who can help you stay balanced - just do not expect that person to always nod. A single “no” can be worth a thousand of “yes’s”.
Myth #3 : You need to take it seriously
As a segway from myths number one and number two, some people get caught into a trap of contemplating the value of it all. Given the label of “mental health”, the tendency is to approach this seriously. The spiral is perpetuated when you wind yourself up by reading too many social feed posts or by developing maximalist conclusions.
Repeating a theme from above, if you are in a camp who believes the whole world is kind of crazy, then you are relatively healthy. The trick with managing related unwellness is about not treating yourself, or the world for that matter, too seriously.
Serious contemplation is not a taboo, but it has its place with a philosophical lens only. It may be useful to tip toe into such topics as educational safari trips into
philosophy of Absurdism. Use humour as an antidote against developing maximalist views.
“Most terrible things in the world have been done by men with serious faces”.
Myth #4 : You need a new routine
There is a lot of advice about keeping oneself happier - some of it is good, and some is just a click-bait noise. It is easy to feel that some routine is being pushed into your life. The suggestion is to stay away from routines that can turn into a religion of false hopes. These hopes, in turn, will force you to wear coloured glasses that distort reality.
There are skills and tricks on how to stay most honest. All of those are about substance, and not about some cadence or a very particular way of doing things. Someone who contemplates on things only once a year, can come up with more meaningful changes in their life as compared to another person who is driven to micro-blog. “I is the hardest word to define” - John Green (Turtles All The Way Down). Don’t rush. Taking your own time and avoiding fads will make you happier.
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